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Greetings from the Afterlife
Oct. 8th, 2018 04:44 pmSorry for the long silence. My computer wasn't set up, and I just wasn't in the mood to post from a device that doesn't have a proper keyboard.
So, how am I?
Home, finally, although first I ended up making an ER visit to get two liters of IV fluids. Not fun. It's bad when you have a mental list of the people you trust to stick you for a line! (Manny in ICU, Cassandra in Pre-op, and Edgar in ER triage). And it didn't help that I spent three hours in the ER waiting for a treatment room, along with high-energy six rug-rats under the age of seven, two mothers and their grandma, who made me look the petite picture of health.
Anyway, home sweet home. I'm being scrupulous about getting my 64 ounces of fluid daily, although by the end of the day, it's all I can do to choke that last pint down. And protein shakes? I hate them. Oh god, how I hate them.
I have my two-week follow-up visit this Thursday, when, according to The Book, I should get soft foods back. Right now, a hard-boiled egg sounds downright orgasmic, to say nothing of tuna or chicken. It's been a long gorram month!
You know, it's funny. Apparently *everyone* who has this procedure has "that moment"...the "oh my god, what have I done, I shouldn't have done this, oh god I'm screwed" moment. I knew I'd have regrets, I expected it--I was just completely wrong about WHY. I expected it to be lamentation about foods I couldn't have, imagine weeping at pizza commercials or being downwind of a fried chicken shack. I thought I'd be craving potato chips, chocolate chip cookies or Oreos.
I can't say I haven't had ANY cravings, but not for any of the usual suspects. First, a diced tomato with a couple tablespoons of warm bacon crumbles and a bit of Hellmann's...juicy and tangy and salty, oh yes.... And then one morning at GK's, while she was at work, I dragged myself into her kitchen to get a shake, opened the fridge and nearly sobbed,, because right there on the shelf was a package of egg rolls...memory supplied the texture of the crispy wrapper, the chewy crunch of cabbage and a lashing of soy sauce. So far, those are the only things I've been really drawn to, although like I said, anything more substantial than yogurt or applesauce will be heavenly.
No, what flipped my freak-out switch was...okay, I've never had any kind of surgery before, dental and cataracts aside. They didn't cover recuperation in detail, more along the lines of, "Drink this, eat that, see you in two weeks.". I figured, okay, I'll need to be careful of the incisions, take things slow and easy...I wasn't expecting to feel like I'd been run over by a steamroller. Not pain so much as zero energy. Plus my digestion has been decidedly off-kilter. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, especially with no solids for it to work on, but it's been messy. (Aside from my ER visit, I haven't been out of the house since the 26th. I'd like to, I just don't entirely trust myself.) Two possibilities scare me: that I've irredeemably screwed myself up, or that I'm too far gone and this isn't going to add to my quality of life in the long run.
Other than bariatric follow-ups, I have something like five other doctor appointments scheduled in the next few weeks. Tomorrow, I have to go to the van service and hopefully get reinstated, otherwise I'm definitely going to be fucked. Let's all hope that goes successfully and I don't have any episodes.
Meanwhile, I've been reading up a storm: I can recommend the Winter and Snow series by C.S. Poe: A gay antique dealer and his homicide detective boyfriend in modern-day NY, with historic NY mysteries as a backdrop. The first one is fairly smutty; the latter two have more character development. Most recently, The Bedlam Detective, by Stephen Gallagher, an Edwardian thriller in which the titular protagonist is trying to determine the sanity of a rich eccentric who is one of the sole survivors of an expedition up the Amazon. If you enjoy Anne Perry, you'll probably enjoy this one. (There are two others; one I'm in the middle of, the third is next on my wish list.)
Anyway, I'm getting by, and thanks for everyone's comments, prayers, et al. I love you guys!
...
So, how am I?
Home, finally, although first I ended up making an ER visit to get two liters of IV fluids. Not fun. It's bad when you have a mental list of the people you trust to stick you for a line! (Manny in ICU, Cassandra in Pre-op, and Edgar in ER triage). And it didn't help that I spent three hours in the ER waiting for a treatment room, along with high-energy six rug-rats under the age of seven, two mothers and their grandma, who made me look the petite picture of health.
Anyway, home sweet home. I'm being scrupulous about getting my 64 ounces of fluid daily, although by the end of the day, it's all I can do to choke that last pint down. And protein shakes? I hate them. Oh god, how I hate them.
I have my two-week follow-up visit this Thursday, when, according to The Book, I should get soft foods back. Right now, a hard-boiled egg sounds downright orgasmic, to say nothing of tuna or chicken. It's been a long gorram month!
You know, it's funny. Apparently *everyone* who has this procedure has "that moment"...the "oh my god, what have I done, I shouldn't have done this, oh god I'm screwed" moment. I knew I'd have regrets, I expected it--I was just completely wrong about WHY. I expected it to be lamentation about foods I couldn't have, imagine weeping at pizza commercials or being downwind of a fried chicken shack. I thought I'd be craving potato chips, chocolate chip cookies or Oreos.
I can't say I haven't had ANY cravings, but not for any of the usual suspects. First, a diced tomato with a couple tablespoons of warm bacon crumbles and a bit of Hellmann's...juicy and tangy and salty, oh yes.... And then one morning at GK's, while she was at work, I dragged myself into her kitchen to get a shake, opened the fridge and nearly sobbed,, because right there on the shelf was a package of egg rolls...memory supplied the texture of the crispy wrapper, the chewy crunch of cabbage and a lashing of soy sauce. So far, those are the only things I've been really drawn to, although like I said, anything more substantial than yogurt or applesauce will be heavenly.
No, what flipped my freak-out switch was...okay, I've never had any kind of surgery before, dental and cataracts aside. They didn't cover recuperation in detail, more along the lines of, "Drink this, eat that, see you in two weeks.". I figured, okay, I'll need to be careful of the incisions, take things slow and easy...I wasn't expecting to feel like I'd been run over by a steamroller. Not pain so much as zero energy. Plus my digestion has been decidedly off-kilter. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, especially with no solids for it to work on, but it's been messy. (Aside from my ER visit, I haven't been out of the house since the 26th. I'd like to, I just don't entirely trust myself.) Two possibilities scare me: that I've irredeemably screwed myself up, or that I'm too far gone and this isn't going to add to my quality of life in the long run.
Other than bariatric follow-ups, I have something like five other doctor appointments scheduled in the next few weeks. Tomorrow, I have to go to the van service and hopefully get reinstated, otherwise I'm definitely going to be fucked. Let's all hope that goes successfully and I don't have any episodes.
Meanwhile, I've been reading up a storm: I can recommend the Winter and Snow series by C.S. Poe: A gay antique dealer and his homicide detective boyfriend in modern-day NY, with historic NY mysteries as a backdrop. The first one is fairly smutty; the latter two have more character development. Most recently, The Bedlam Detective, by Stephen Gallagher, an Edwardian thriller in which the titular protagonist is trying to determine the sanity of a rich eccentric who is one of the sole survivors of an expedition up the Amazon. If you enjoy Anne Perry, you'll probably enjoy this one. (There are two others; one I'm in the middle of, the third is next on my wish list.)
Anyway, I'm getting by, and thanks for everyone's comments, prayers, et al. I love you guys!
...