Confessions of a One-Track Mind

Here we are, turning the page on the calendar to March, which means I have just completed my first solid month of work. I submitted my "invoice" (their version of a time card) this evening, for a total of 90 hours.

Which probably doesn't sound like much to the 40-hours-per crowd, but it's been an uphill battle for me, it having been such a very long time since I've had this much structure in my life. The first couple weeks, by the time Friday rolled around, I felt like I'd been hit by a truck---but it's getting better.

At some point in the next 30 days, I'll have a paycheck; Pay ALL the bills! will be my battle cry. No more of those humiliating end-of-the-month phone calls begging for help with insurance or utilities. Oh, how I want to be caught up and PAID AHEAD. I can't even....

Supposedly, we're going to have a cold snap this weekend, so I skipped most of Person of Interest (a rerun) and took a shower and washed my hair. Hair is at the in-between growing out stage of hanging in my eyes but not long enough to tuck behind an ear...I twist the too-long bangs around and clip them back. Not flattering, but priority-wise, a fresh haircut comes after paying bills, somewhere between car repair and getting the lawn mowed. May, maybe? In time for summer, that's for sure.

Right now, my head is in a better state than it's been since, oh, last July, at least. I'm not under that looming cloud of I'M FUCKED---which was my frame of mind, growing ever more trapped and doomed as the months went on. .thanks, y'all, for putting up with my crazy, and all your encouragement and support. I WOULD NOT have made it through without you. Really.

TT---FN.

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It's been a long time since Friday was a special day of the week. Now that I'm working again, though, I can say, "I'm so glad it's Friday!" and it isn't just because I get to oogle Tom Selleck on "Blue Bloods".

Saturday is the ONE day of the week I don't have an alarm set for (although the chances are 50/50 that I'll blow off church in favor of blessed SLEEP).

Next week is going to be interesting; I get to meet two of the gals I've been talking to for CSR training. We were debating where to get together, since it had to be somewhere with wifi and not too many distractions. I suggested my local library, which has small meeting rooms available, and Marketing Exec agreed that that would be suitable and booked us a room. Sooner or later, she and the others will evolve to nicknames or initials, but at the moment, they are what they do.

It was nice to have my suggestion adopted, since I've been feeling a bit unappreciated so far. I've expressed a couple of ideas on some of the conference calls (there are several every week, another one of those processes that's new and strange to me), and so far, VP has shrugged them off. Okay, fine. I'll just sit here and shut up, if that's what you want....

I'm actually in a pretty good mood, though. I love being able to wake up and check my email in bed and hit the 'snooze' button on my phone alarm a few times, then stroll across the hall and start work. And being able to pause as needed for a potty break or to get a beverage or run down to the mailbox is awesome. They're looking for output, and I'm ON that.

On the side, I'm maintaining my room, because after the marathon days of getting it cleared out, I *don't* want it to backslide, and I took 10 minutes on my lunch break to hang some things up. Output on the job and upkeep at home, that's my life at the moment, and it beats the hell out of whimpering and hyperventilating about how much my life sucks.

Currently, I've got laundry happening---I want to be sure I have presentable outfits to wear for my meetings next week. Not that I'd show up in anything ratty---I've expunged most of that sort of thing from my wardrobe---but BigRed's comment the other week has stuck with me. Appropriate. It has to be professional.

Oh joy, a weekend...maybe I can even write some of the pr0n that keeps distracting me. That's the downside to working from home---I'm not used to focusing in this seat, I'm used to staring into space and contemplating various kinky permutations of Slot A and Tab B....

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