Good grief, another one! (More of what set me off this morning)

[vanillafluffy]

From a different source, I have a 24 year old actress saying, "Monogamy is a weird thing for me. It's an overrated virtue, because, let's face it, we're fucking animals."

I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and *presume* she isn't talking about beasiality. Since I'm older than both of these chickies added together, I'm trying to remember what being 24 felt like---quite a bit hornier than 47, I seem to recall, and 47 still has the urge, yes indeedy.

But still.

That's two young women in less than 12 hours who've gone on record equating the sex drive with animal instinct that it's okay to pursue at will. Now, far be it from me to put down sex. Find me the right individual, and I'm good with that! For me, "the right individual" is the crux of the sentence. I don't want to screw just anyone: I want a partner, someone I have things in common with after we've climbed back out of bed (or the backseat, or wherever). If I just want a quick orgasm, I can take care of that myself in a few minutes without the bother of getting dressed up to troll for a temporary "mate". My emotional needs outweigh my physical needs.

I'm disturbed by the spirit of indiscriminate fuckery that permeates both these quotes, which ignores the fact that some animals ARE monogamous. "Monogamy is weird." I find myself wondering if both these girls are from broken homes. What examples were set for them in their formative years? How did they both arrive at this conclusion?

Maybe I'm the one who's hopelessly old-fashioned. After all, my parents had a stable, 35 year marriage until my mom's death. (My dad didn't go hunting for women afterward, either, although he did rent porn vids.) My mother was shocked that I thought sex before marriage was okay; this sort of thinking would've made her swoon. I may not have bought into that, but I do insist on love before sex, animal instinct or no. Does that make me anticuado, a fossil? *sigh* Perhaps so.

It's my self-respect, I think I'll keep it.

Comments

[vanillafluffy.livejournal.com]

Okay, I'm gonna own this, and it may be WAY TMI, but technically I didn't lose my virginity until I was 39. (If one defines that as going to bed with a member of the opposite sex. Same sex, well, a couple experiments in my 20s and 30s. On the whole, I'd say I'm 85% het.) Not because I was dedicated to celibacy, by any means, but because it seemed like the guys I was interested in didn't reciprocate, and the guys who were, I didn't. *Finally* I met someone who struck sparks and ended up in a heavy-duty relationship for 4 years...and the trouble was, he thought monogamy was optional, and I thought it was mandatory. So...I'm on the market again, older and wiser. I have no regrets about having waited, but I'm not sorry about the relationship, either. It may have been the wrong relationship for a lot of the wrong reasons, but it was definitely a Learning Experience.

[hippediva.livejournal.com]

*G* Not TMI at all, luv. The good thing is there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to go about living one's life with others and that does include sex. *G* What I've found at 52 is that monogamy is not mandatory but it certainly is preferrable. Like lying, sleeping around requires far too much effort. You have to remember to get tested, ask pertinent (albeit sometimes embarrassing) questions and all that. It's just easier to be faithful----and, in my case with Sonny, a helluva lot more fun. I'm definitely getting old but I like it!! ROFL!

[vanillafluffy.livejournal.com]

Hey, good on you if you're still satisfied with the choice you made back in the day. That's kinda what I was driving at---it's certainly possible; why is it becoming less and less the norm?

[socialhermit.livejournal.com]

Okay, I'm gonna own this, and it may be WAY TMI, but technically I didn't lose my virginity until I was 39.

Man, I wish *I'd* waited til I was in my 30's before I had sex. It would've prevented a helluva lot of grief!

[vanillafluffy.livejournal.com]

Which is one of the strongest reasons I waited...

But y'know, after the first few months of gorging, so to speak, on the pleasures of the flesh, it stopped being a novelty. Now, the best thing I can say about it all is, well, now I can write porn with a helluva lot more confidence.

[socialhermit.livejournal.com]

well, now I can write porn with a helluva lot more confidence.

ROFLMAO! You've got a point, there! ;-)